Ep18 Managing Your Energy, Maintaining a Good Vibe

In this eye-opening episode of the Better Relationships podcast, Dr. Dar Hawks, the relationship healer, challenges the narrative of powerlessness that many women feel in today's world. 

With her insightful advice, she illuminates the path to self-empowerment by focusing on the importance of mood and energy. 

Explore the seven areas of self-honor that can lead to a joyful and unstoppable life, and join a community dedicated to fostering healthier, happier, and harmonious relationships.

Transcript

1:28

This year has been unbelievable, even for a fiction story. Just when we think it cannot get more unfathomable, it does. From a global pandemic, the rise of patriarchal desire for control and domination, irreconcilable weather related events and devastation worldwide. Older men and women behaving like the spoiled child who is not getting his way, and the women who support them, to the lack of accountability with criminal and predatory behavior. Oh, I could go on and on, but I think you get my gist here. Turning on the radio Pandora or the television, opening a magazine or the news, checking your cell phone doesn't matter what we're looking at or what gets our attention. It results in a bombing of opinionated information that is called news, when truly all it is is entertainment designed to lure you in to that rabbit hole of feeling good or not feeling good. I like to simplify things, and those are the two purposes for entertainment. Enough of the doom and gloom for me for now. I acknowledge all of this is going on in our world today for sure. But as a woman, there's a lot we can do when the world around us has turned to crap. We may feel powerless, as though we have no control and can do nothing to transform this darkness, but I believe we can. And it all starts with our energy and our mood. You've heard that saying, that if mama's not happy, then nobody's happy. That is all about our energy and our mood. As women, we underestimate the power of our energy and our mood. You see, I firmly believe our mood creates our joys or strife. I firmly believe our mood impacts and radiates out and affects others and our environment. When we feel good, we are unstoppable, blissful and centered in self love. We all have had those moments when we felt this way, when we were unstoppable and we felt so good inside and out. Oh, that we could just do anything and be who we are. And to sustain or maintain that feel good vibration, it really and truly starts with honoring yourself and then nurturing your nature instead of life defined by anyone or anything other, than yourself. I feel as though we, as women, have been dictated to and dominated for centuries. And today I invite us to live from a space of empowered, loving, feel good choice and possibility. So, just to remind you that feeling good and maintaining that feel good vibration starts with honoring yourself and then nurturing your nature. Now, there are seven areas where I invite you to honor yourself. The first one is your own worth. No one can dictate your own worth. Believe me, I know. I've had many people try to dictate to me what my worth is. But what I realized is that I was unclear about my own worth for myself. And due to that lack of clarity, it allowed others to diminish my worth. Therefore, I was giving them permission to diminish my worth. So, spending time and energy and investing in looking at getting your worth closet, so to speak, of self worth and your money aligned, ah, with love and feeling good is crucial. The second area where I invite you to honor yourself is around your body and beauty image. We all are unique, and we've all been taught and programmed and been conditioned to think and believe that there's only one form of beauty or a very societal definition of it. I am glad to see that there are organizations today that are honoring the uniqueness of our bodies and beauty. And I'm glad and thankful that there are opportunities for us to see alternatives of what body, love and image really is. So I invite you to honor yourself, your body and your beauty, your inner and outer beauty. The fourth area where I invite you to honor yourself is with your words and actions. The words you say about yourself and the actions that you take that either honor or dishonor yourself make a difference, and they either make a difference for feeling good or they contribute to not feeling good. So I, really invite you to be at choice and be honoring of your words and your actions. As a side note, the words and actions of others. Hm. That's a whole nother conversation for another day. But we have got to honor ourselves and no longer accept words and actions that do not feel good from others. The fifth area is around your thoughts. What are you thinking about? Yourself. Your worth, your money, your relationships, your body, your beauty, your ability with language and math and science and learning. Your abilities and your talents. What thoughts do you have about yourself? And I really want you to shift to a place of having honoring thoughts. The 6th area is around your abilities and your talents. Really want you to honor your abilities and your talents and the gifts that you have that are unique to you. No one can paint like you. The definition of beautiful painting is very subjective. And so I invite you with that example of, whatever it is that you're engaged in, whatever you're trying, maybe it's something new, maybe it's something that you've been able to do for a long time. We all have skills, and we all have varying degrees of where that skill is. As far as, ability goes, regardless, your words and your thoughts about your abilities matter. They absolutely matter. And if your thoughts about your abilities don't feel good, it's time to shift. It's time to make a change. Time to shift and create more feel good thoughts and feel good, space around your skills and abilities. The other thing I also want to say about honoring your abilities is that if you're weak in an area and it's just drudgery for you to do that thing that you so do not enjoy doing, find a way to drop it. Find a way to not have to do it. And if you need some help, because you cannot drop it, there are other ways to find joy in getting, that thing done. And it's really all about honoring yourself and your energy and taking small, steps towards completing it. Because we all have things that we really don't enjoy doing in our lives, but they're necessary, right? I used to really not enjoy cleaning toilets. I used to hate it. And I remember one day, after years of just this chore, this heavy energy of, I realized I was taking all of this negative energy into my bedroom and bathroom. And I thought, that does not feel good. And so I started looking at what are ways that I can actually be in a feel good space. Now, I have to tell you, when I'm in a feel good space, those chores do not take that long to complete. And they're actually, pleasant. It's pleasant to have the end result of a clean toilet, wouldn't you agree? But the big transformation for me happened when I realized the energy and my mood that I was bringing into my environment, in relationship with this example for cleaning my bathroom and toilet was so icky and negative. And I thought, that's not what I want in this space. I want this to be a sacred, calm, safe, clean, hygienic, loving environment. And when I truly got that and realized how dishonoring I was being to my physical space and how that was impacting me, it shifted. So you can really find joy in those, things that you have to do. And the abilities. I mean, cleaning a toilet certainly is an ability for me, anyway. you can find the joy in it, but really pay attention to this next one. The environment and your environment at home and in your workplace. When you honor yourself, then your environment is honored, your home isn't honored, and your workplace is honored. And your mood and your feel good vibe has an impact and radiates out. An example of this would be let's say you've come into your workplace and somebody's just in a horrible mood, or your manager is in a really nasty mood and you can just feel it. Everyone can really feel it. And you notice people are avoiding each other. They're being quiet, they're staying at their desks energetically. You see them really, their energies just wants to crawl under the table. So that's an example of how your feel good vibe and a feel good vibe and a not feel good vibe can make a difference. Honor yourself. Your feelgood vibe is yours to own, control, maintain and sustain. No one can take that away from you. No matter how much crap is around a lotus flower, it still rises out of the muck into a beautiful blossom. This is a symbol of what it is to be divine, feminine. You are that beautiful blossom no matter how much crap is around you. I invite you to find your feel good space and ways to honor yourself. When we feel good, we stand in our inner and outer power, our freedom, love, joy, and we feel completely safe. I believe right now, today, our purpose as women more than ever is to feel good. To feel good about ourselves, our lives, our work, our home and our relationships, and radiate that feelgood energy out into the world. This alone creates unimaginable ripples of transformation worldwide. I invite you to feel good. If you're going through some crappy stuff and would like to speak with someone to find the feelgood in all of it, in a sacred, safe and confidential space, please contact me@drdar.com. Contact I am so here for you and I see you as that lotus flower rising out of the muck in your feel good vibration mood and in you honoring yourself. Thank you for the gift of your time and being here with me. Do let me know what's happening in your world. And just a reminder, I invite you to feel good.